sports satire – Iron E-News

Our top Sports reporter, Richard Head, lives and dies by the journalistic mantra: "always go straight to the source". At least that's what he told the judge last year before being told to refrain from any contact (physical or otherwise) with one Thomas Edward Patrick Brady Jr., current quarterback for the New England Patriots, and to maintain a 100-yard distance from him at all times. "Yes, it does make it difficult to do my job," Richard told us. "But don't worry, I'll have a full report on Brady's status as soon as ESPN does. I'm gonna live-tweet the sh-- out of their report." After we went ahead and read the latest ESPN update for ourselves, it seems that, "Brady was limited in practice Wednesday because of a right hand injury...He has been on and off the injury report this season ...

Iron E-Sports News was given an exclusive interview with the 266th pope of the Roman Catholic Church, Pope Francis (or Jorge Mario Bergoglio to his mom) to get his take on the current state of the NFL as well as a few thoughts on last year's season. Pope Francis, a well respected sports gambler, said he had his money on Aaron Rodgers early on in the season. "Aaron is blessed," the Francis revealed. "He's the only one who consistently relies on the holy 'hail mary' pass. Other quarterbacks neglect it to their own detriment." "You may not know this, but I also always put a little money down for the Browns because God roots for the underdog." When asked about how God handles conflicting prayers from the various teams, Pope Francis had some surprising remarks: "God plays favorite...

Tag: sports satire

What do We Know about Brady’s Hand Injury? Not much after Restraining Order

The Pope on Aaron Rodgers’ Season: “His Hail Mary’s were Full of Grace”