Study: Mayonnaise from the Devil
Conclusive data uncovered in a new and impartial study conducted by the highly professional food scientists here at the Iron E Research Center in Shanghai, has shown that the popular condiment known to the world as mayonnaise actually comes from the vats of Hades.
Some of us have had our suspicions about the insidious white sludge for quite some time but have held our tongues, strictly in the interests of science.
Today, millions of consumers all around the world remain under the happy delusion that this fatty amalgamation of olive oil, egg yolk, and death is made in the loving factories of companies such as Kraft and Kewpie; and inadvertently overlook certain clues that, when taken as a whole, make the truth seem quite obvious.
The first and most obvious one of course is the brand name...