Gaddafi Forgets Correct Spelling of Own Name

LYBIA—Who is the real Muammar Gaddafi anway? Dictator? Dad? Fashionista? The man of many hats is also the man of many names but it seems that even Gaddafi is unsure now about the one his mother gave him.

Last night, the more-than-famous Lybian leader, while writing a check to a local grocer in Tripoli, became confused about the correct spelling of his name, and had a bit of trouble convincing the 16-year-old teller that he really was Gaddafi.

“I blame the media, you know,” Gaddafi surmised. “Reuters spells it Gaddafi, the New Yorker spells it Qaddafi, and Yahoo spells it Kadhafi. Who can keep it straight anymore?”

According to Gaddafi, the lawyer that had his birth records met an unfortunate end during the current conflict and, somehow, all the records were destroyed along with his entire body.

“It’s funny, this other guy named Khadafi who lives next to my palace has started getting my Netflix. Just wait till he gets a shipment of weapons…that should freak him out! Haha. (Turning to his bodyguard) Remind me to kill him.”