Society

Feeling Smart is the New Smart
Society

Feeling Smart is the New Smart

Let's be honest, feeling smart is way better, and so much more important, than being smart.  If you don't feel smart, how can you be self-confident?  If you can't be self-confident, how can you be a success?  If you can't be a success, how can you feel smart?  See?  It's easy. Here are some of the top ways to help yourself feel smart: -Use air-quotes a lot -Roll your eyes every time someone says something (especially if it sounds smart) -Carry around a solved Rubik's cube -Wear non-prescription glasses -Use in-group abbreviations whenever possible (The Times, Wash-Po, etc.) -Say you're part of a book club (or better, that you quit because they were reading dumb books) -Put on your 'serious face' more often -Use that one logical fallacy you remember from college in every argument ...
Dictionaries to become Like Wikipedia to Stay Relevant
Society

Dictionaries to become Like Wikipedia to Stay Relevant

The major dictionaries of the world, like Oxford, Cambridge, Merriam-Webster, and thefreedictionary.com--once preeminent preservers of meaning and definition--are all abandoning centuries of etymological tradition to embrace a new and more fluid reality--one where you can define your own. This sort of DIY approach to truth is all the rage right now, and so institutions long considered archaic and out of touch are looking to regain relevancy among a population who won't be told how to live, who they are, or even what an 'is' is. In order to do this, all online dictionaries are now making themselves more like Wikipedia, but with everyone having admin privileges. "We're redefining ourselves, if you'll excuse the paronomasia," said James Murray, principal editor of the Oxford English ...
Top Ten Emotional Support Pets
Society

Top Ten Emotional Support Pets

Blob Fish - no explanation necessary. If you have an emotional support animal, you know how great they are.  You also know that dogs are tres passé.  In their stead, people are turning to other more obvious heroes such as the ones below.  Here is the official list of animals that have been scientifically proven to help you recover from mental and emotional distress:
A College Student Considers the Irony of Modern Life
Society

A College Student Considers the Irony of Modern Life

A bunch of lit classes I have to take (because they make you take them if you’re a communications major, even though I don’t see what literature has to do with communication) have books in them talking about all the irony we have in modern life. And even though some guy said 9-11 was the death of irony I noticed there’s still plenty of it around, especially in college. And since my high school counselor Mrs. Gebbershotz said your supposed to make connections between you and the material to be learned, I noticed I have a whole shitload of irony in my life right now, because of breaking up with my girlfriend. But I should try to establish a historical context—well, not about my girlfriend. I met her at a kegger and she was so drunk her friends started calling her “Spring Break,” and slurr...
Research Shows Many, in fact, have Flown over the Cuckoo’s Nest
Religion

Research Shows Many, in fact, have Flown over the Cuckoo’s Nest

It is a misnomer, one that has apparently seeped into the culture’s subconscious, that only one person flew over the cuckoo’s nest. This myth, perpetuated by the 70’s movie classic of the same name, has become so ingrained into our psyche that it is safe to say public perception will never change no matter how much evidence is presented to the contrary. Nevertheless, Iron E-News is here to do its part. Strange birds of all colors, shapes, and sizes, numbering in the billions, have made that fateful journey over the lowly jester’s tree and over the King of fools himself–The Cuckoo--into the darkening sky of intellectual infamy and worldly disgrace. Here are some of the more notable odd birds: Literature Fyodor Dostoevsky – (11 November 1821 – 9 February 1881) was a Rus...
Five Myths about Myths
Society

Five Myths about Myths

1.  Myths actually exist (subtle double/triple meaning not intentional…or was it?). 2.  Some myths are perceived as greater or lesser myths based on the author, appropriate contextual language, and frequency of dragons (for the reason why number 2 is a myth please refer to number 1). *As a clarification to number two, in the historical sciences, these myths are termed as Mythy Myths and are more mythy or less mythy based on their score in the official Rubric for Accurately Designating Mythy Myths and Legendary Legends.  This has led to such common expressions among scholars as “That’s the mythiest myth I’ve ever come across!” 3.  Any jokes or puns used to connect the word “myth” with “miss” are funny. 4.  Any jobs related to the study or creation of myths are actual jobs (again...